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He was raised by parents who were career missionaries. Norman Doidge, a psychiatrist and psychoanalyst, described in his best-selling book The Brain That Changes Itself, "The addictiveness of Internet pornography is not a metaphor. Years later, when he confessed his addiction, he told me he felt like the girl in the magazine was smiling right at him—a feeling of connection at an otherwise lonely time. This experience has changed me in profound ways. Over time, he needed more and a lot stronger stimuli for his brain to reach the same dopamine levels, to feel good for just a little while. I was experiencing what experts now call betrayal trauma. What had been bubbling under the surface for years was finally out. When I confronted him about it, my worst fears were confirmed. Having grown up mostly in Africa where his parents were missionaries, he found himself a young high-school grad back in the United States—a foreign country to him and his family was on another continent far, far away. I have compassion for how my husband became addicted to porn. In that moment, in my heart I heard God speak to me and say. Unfortunately in the nineties there was little understanding of the condition, and where my husband and I turned for help, I often got bad advice—from both my church and therapists who didn't understand the complexity of porn addiction. It was what many would view as an idyllic existence. After thirty-three years of marriage, with the last nine years desperately trying to find a way to help him recover, we had come to a point where the only way for me to be safe was to remove myself. W hy can't you make room for porn in your life or marriage.

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Description: He told himself once he got married he wouldn't need it anymore, but by then he was severely addicted. But something felt wrong, and I couldn't figure out what it is was. You cannot allow in your life things that are designed to attack and destroy your emotional, physical, and spiritual health. Fashion has the power to reveal the best and the worst of ourselves. What had been bubbling under the surface for years was finally out. Coming to this realization helped me immensely. My husband wasn't the type you'd think would have a secret life. I felt my life was over. Nineteen years in, I could have never imagined my husband had a secret wreaking havoc on his personal life that was about to wreak havoc on our marriage. When I confronted him about it, my worst fears were confirmed. Years later, when he confessed his addiction, he told me he felt like the girl in the magazine was smiling right at him—a feeling of connection at an otherwise lonely time. In my husband, I saw porn impact how he was able to think and respond to life situations.
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